The call came at 5:00 am --”I have an order here for Ms Dana Golden” is all the voice said
“Order? Which order?” I stumbled --still in a dream about what exactly I forgot--a balloon ride across Africa’s savannah or some such ridiculous movie that was playing inside my head.
“Package is here waiting outside” said the not too polite voice.
“Well just leave it there?” I said with a half yawn-treating a 5:00 am delivery as normal and in my sleepy state unaware of any danger.
“Sorry we can’t ma’am--we need a signature.” he said robotically.
“At 5:00 am in the fucking morning you need a fucking signature?” I said, awake now.
“Afraid so madam” he replied without emotion
“Bullshit--its not going to happen” I said growing a bit alarmed at the guy’s persistence
“Its a large package” He said now sounding like the real nutjobs I was trying to escape from in Ohio..
Before I could get my escape plan figured out, however, two masked men broke down my door and in a matter of seconds one of the men held me in a headlock while the other gagged me with PVC tape and took my ass out of there before I could properly scream.
I was taken into a black SUV and pushed unceremoniously into the cargo space.
After a good hour of driving we pulled into what looked like corporate office block. We parked in an underground garage and I was then frog marched into a basement room equipped with only one fluorescent tube and an office chair next to a metal desk.
“Fuck you” was all I could yell out when they ripped off the gag which one of them did after we were well on our way.
“That’s no way for our next communications director to talk said a tall blonde woman made up like an Avon lady in a bright red dress all dyed blonde hair and an awful bitchy smirk.
“What kind of nonsense are you talking about?”” I asked
“Your boss wants you to work for him--what’s wrong with that? she said in a more civil tone.
“Why did you have to kidnap me then?” I asked innocently enough.
“Just to remind you whose boss” with a curl to her lips.
“I have to get out of here--you have no right to kidnap me” I said hoping she would hear the desperation in my voice.
“It was all done out of “ she said reverting to her bitchy tone—the one she clearly felt most comfortable using.
I felt like slapping her but my arms were tied.
“Let me know when you are ready to interview. “ she said turning on her four inch stilettos.
“We left you some outfits and cosmetics should you decide to pretty up” she said before she slammed the door behind her.
“Fuck you again—I would appreciate a glass of water” Probably not the most diplomatic response. At that she walked back to face me.
“OK bitch got back down to the cellar” She then clicked her fingers and two beefy guys grabbed each of my arms and escorted me down to another dark room full of broken furniture.
This was the GL administration I thought as I lay on a broken mattress sobbing. Thugs all of them. Terrorists. Fascists.
During what might have been 20 minutes of sobbing, coughing and screaming “I want some water” one of the guards threw me a phone--David Ross wants to speak to you.
“You in the building?” was how he began
“Yes got a wonderful reception” I said barely able to get the words out but realizing that yelling at him would not probably get results.
“Sorry about that. They made a mistake--the word that you were joining me got lost somewhere--they placed you on a different list” he said in a matter of fact tone.
“What is that list? They beat the shit out of their list?” I said irate
He chuckled
“That’s no fucking laughing matter--these guys are real storm troopers. Good thing I am not Jewish”
“I’m sure that they will do everything in their power to make amends” he said in the same whispered tone
“Come up in an hour --I left instructions for them to take you to a VIP room where you can get cleaned up.”
“Thanks I think” I said my sobs continuing unabated until I saw a claret colored suited woman bimbo an down market version a Fly Emirates look with a smile approach me and provide me with what looked like a plastic hotel key and an envelope.
“We are so sorry for the inconvenience--there was a mistake in handling your reception.” She said without emotion.
“That is rich” I said while smiling through my tears that then suddenly burst forth again
“Pardon?” she said as if she was my middle school teacher correcting what she saw was some aberrant behavior.
“In the package you will find your “on boarding documents” she paused to check my reaction
“Good they are not waterboarding documents--that's a relief” I said trying to keep it light
“There is also information about our policies and procedures--where you will live and how you will need to conduct yourself. There is also a schedule of meetings that we will arrange for you. We will give you an hour to clean yourself up and then arrange your meeting with Mr Ross.” she said like the tour guide she wished she was.
In the hotel room there were a few outfits I was supposed to wear, assorted toiletries, a tablet computer, phone and briefcase. Everything I needed to become a member of the new GL administration--nazism in other words with a smile.
David was there in his penthouse office with open arms ready to greet me with arms open. After ducking the hug he closed his office door.
“So what now-you got me here--to be your staffer?” I asked
“Thanks— cannot apologize enough” he said with only a hint of sincerity.
“OK let's dispense with the insincerity and the games--I have no idea why you want a radical feminist who disagrees with everything that GL as your “communications” person. How can I defend this monster—someone who grabbed his way into power--He’s like a rapist--if the woman doesn’t consent--just tear her clothes off and gag her and then she’ll come along --that is the way you and GL work” I blurted out
“I don’t work that way” he said matter of factly.
“Of course you do--how did I get here-by being gagged that’s how” I said still furious.
“Mistake for which I apologize several times” he said like a telephone marketeer.
“You can never apologize for these goons enough” I replied bluntly
“I don’t think we can talk securely here, he whispered. Then saying loudly that he wanted to give me a number to call.”
I was confused for a second until I realized that he was aware of the snooping eyes of the GL regime. “I'm Getting out of here--”this is a fu*ked up Nazi party. Play along” I nodded my head’
If I had my phone we could exchange the numbers but this I guess is the old fashioned way I said trying to be helpful.
Where can we meet I mouthed as if talking to a deaf child
We talked complete nonsense about how we planned to get “the messaging” done right --using all the code words that GL would resonate with. “Organized”,-”Clear.” “One message a day” “Multichannel and Multiplatform”
“TikTok” “Instagram” and “We Chat” were all mentioned as if they were drinks and we were arranging a bar with the right combination of alcoholic beverages
He got his pencil there is a Hotel called the Occidental not far from here--meet me at the bar at 7;00 pm
He wrote it down and I smiled and then tore up the notes.
We met that evening --without an obvious tail as Ross reminded me. I was down to wearing a quite nice black pencil skirt with standard white blouse and red jacket--he was dressed in a shiny blue suit with blue shirt and yellow tie
“So for real you fucked up telling them I was to be picked up for an interview to join your GL administration”
“Yes I mean no--they send the standard welcome party apparently for any new staffer--they forget to tell me
Its a form of hazing--just to remind them they have all the power to do anything they like with you and you have precisely none”
“What are you drinking? He asked
“Mint Julep” I replied having listened to a podcas
“I didn’t know you were a mint julep girl” he said trying to be seductive
“Plenty you don’t know about me” I said using my best Mae West impression
I’m sticking with whisky on the rocks he told the bartender.
“So we are being watched” he confided but as long as they think we are doing some government business we can be fine.
“I’m wondering how I got signed up for this. It was the last thing I wanted to do was being dressed up like a budding MBA executive working for Nazis
“ Look preferred to be a radio jock cheering from the sidelines--I never took them that seriously. I thought it was all a bit of a joke but now I see they are crazy fanatics who really believe in this fascist nonsense. I thought Biden was a zero-a man who kind of stumbled around without a real spine --and GL the one prepared to take risks to call things by their proper name. But as things turned out--all GL wanted was power and all Biden wanted was a safe country that you could recognize as the United States that he could leave to his grandchildren.”
So like you goes the world--people who are just too fucking stupid to believe that someone who had nearly brought off a coup on January 6 could be counted on to do it again. Who said things like he intends to be a dictator “from day one”--all that a joke--a joke on you.”
“Accepted criticism. We are all Americans who don’t believe a fellow American”
“Are capable of harm
“No its just because he is a white male with money who comforts your prejudices that you not only tolerate this nutcase but give him a platform that allows him to speak directly to the least educated and the most anxious that what little they have will be taken away from them by people who don’t look like them.” I said sounding like I was getting on a high horse.
eDestroying our country's constitution. Betraying its friends and allies and starting world war 3”
“I can see your communications chops are in good working order” he said condescendingly
“Thank you, I will try to stay humble--so what's your plan?”I asked
“We tape every conversation with every senior official. We leak their plans to set up detention camps all over the country” he said as quietly as possible with his face in my ear.
“But how do you prevent them from sending us to detention camps--or firing squad--whatever those Nazis decide?” I whispered back in the other ear like we were lovers.
“There’s no way to eliminate risk” he murmured back.
“How about leaving for Costa Rica--first plane out I asked?”
“Can’t escape--no passport--no won’t track us down and kill us” he mumbled as he attempted to touch my arm.
“Get on the highway now?” I insisted madly.
“Good luck with that--they will follow you in the SUVs they have parked outside” he replied
“Oh fuck--oh boy how we are fucked--thanks Dave--thanks for getting me caught inside the GL nazi web;’ I said with anger but keeping the volume as low as possible.
“Make as though we are having a good time--laugh a bit and then hold my hand like we are becoming close friends” he said gently.”
“I will do anything but hold that greasy hand of yours so don’t have any illusions --I hate your fucking guts Ross” I said through my teeth covering it all up with a laugh to keep up appearances.
“So what is your secret plan so we don’t get found out?” I asked
“I can’t tell you yet--I am still working out the trust phase of our relationship” he said
“Funny so am I” I said reflecting my doubt that he was being totally honest with me
I reflected on the trust issue as I insisted on getting a Uber rather than being driven back to HQ with his designated driver. Then I realized I didn’t have my phone--I sobbed.”
“You and your GL gang have taken every last shred of independence and dignity from me. What the fuck do you want. I am not going to be your Eva Braun. I won’t stand for this Nazi nonsense.” I said in the least angry tone I could muster.
“Join me in the resistance--the resistance will prevail. There are many more of us who want to see an end to this regime, he whispered to me as we stood in the lavish lobby of the Occidental hotel .” He said
“I want that more than anything--but I think I want my freedom back more.” I replied
“Lets see if we can get you both” he said
One of the black SUV’s that were lying in wait swung by and we climbed in. There were too many thoughts jostling through my mind to focus on the dilemma I was in. I had stopped noticing things such as that Dave had his phone out and was texting someone and my phone was still confiscated.